Thursday, June 26, 2008

A Poem For Bradley

This poem was written by Joanna Sakievich. She is in the Mt.Airy Ward and she sent this to me in a card. I thought it was beautiful. It is written from the babies point of view.

Unborn Musings

While growing inside you, I wondered so much
how would it be to smell, feel, and see
all the wonder of touch?

Everyone told me, it's not like we imagined,
the things that we spoke of, like pain, fear, and passion.
Undaunted I waited for my turn to come
I'd be the best of the best, help guide everyone home.

I sensed that your love for me equaled my own;
the hunger to be with you, was not felt alone.

But, then Heavenly father, who always knows best,
called me back to Him- Ive finished my test.

How can I describe what it's like here to cry?
Without having lived, how could I die?
Happy and safe-yet aching to feel your kiss on my face.

But God and I love you, we always will.
Happy, sad; good or bad, that love, unwavering, lingers still.

I will never grow old nor doubt truth that I'm told.
Time cannot tempt me to doubt, question, or hate you,
rather, with gratitude, I'll pray for you.
And the only pain I'll ever know, lies in sharing yours below.
Whenever you suffer, mourn, and cry, so will I.

So what ever happens, please don't be too sad.
Dearest Mommy and beloved Dad,
Someday with joy celestial we'll meet,
to hug and kiss with souls complete.

April 2008, by Joanna Sakievich

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Bradley Todd Herman

This by far the hardest post i have ever written. As most of you know, Mat and i were expecting our second child. last week i didn't feel him move for a few days. I started to get worried and decided to call the Doctor. Our worst fears were confirmed when the Ultrasound technician told us she couldn't find a heartbeat. My heart exploded. I couldn't understand why this was happening, or what had happened. I had just been to the Dr. the week before and everything was perfect. As i sobbed the Dr. told me that i needed to go to the hospital and have a C-section. I can't even describe the mix of sadness, and loss i had at that moment. We checked into the hospital at 3 pm. They couldn't do the operation until 10pm, so I just had to wait. It was so awful, i don't think i have ever cried so much in my entire life. Matt and a member of the stake presidency(Brother Jefferies) gave me a blessing before i had to go. It was such a comforting and powerful blessing. I am so grateful for the priesthood in my life. When they had done the surgery, and they were stitching me up, they told us that Bradley's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck 4 times. It was very unusual and just an accident. I was relieved to know that it was nothing that i had done , and that it wasn't something genetic, that could affect other pregnancies. he was such a beautiful boy. He was 2 lbs 1 oz and 13 in. long. He looked perfect. He had red hair and big hands and feet. infact, he looked just like Matt, with my nose. He was just what we wanted. we had time to hold him and talk to him. It was a bitter sweet moment. I was so happy to be with him and so sad the let him go. Matt loved him immediately, and was so happy that he decided to see him and say goodbye. This past week has been so serial and almost not real. We had a funeral for Bradley yesterday and it was beautiful. Matt and my Dad spoke. Matt's Dad, and Grandma gave the prayers and we had a wonderful organ medley played. It couldn't have gone better. Brother Jefferies dedicated his grave and all the kids put roses on his casket. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been here for us, for all the phone calls and flowers. Thank to my ward for so much support and love. I don't think i have ever felt so loved anywhere else. I love you guys and pray that your homes will be happy and filled with the spirit. I don't know when this pain will pas but i do know that my Heavenly Father loves me and that i have a perfect little boy waiting for me in Heaven. Thank you for all your prayers, i have felt everyone of them.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Bailey's First Hair Cut

We we finally gave in. Bailey's hair was looking a little scraggly( is that a word?) It actually looked like a "V" shape if you looked at her from behind. She had really cute ringlets down the middle bottom of her hair and i didn't want to cut them. But i did, I it is still pretty cute. I actually couldn't do it myself, so i had Matt's mom do it while i supervised. It only took a few minutes and she did really well:) I can't believe how grown up my sweet little Bailey Kaye is. This is just one of many milestones for her and i am excited to watch her go through them.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Catch up

So I am a slacker on my blog and have left out many fun and crazy things that have gone on this month...First we went to Matt's family cabin in Sweetwater CO. It was really fun since we got to be there with 2 of his sister's families and his dad and step mom.

Family pic in front of Sweetwater lake. It is so beautiful there. We love being there with family.

Matt and Bailey Cheesing for the camera:)

Bailey getting measured at the cabin. She was 3 ft 1 1/2 inches tall. She is pretty much a giant:)



The things kids get into.

Bailey rubbed ketchup all over herself the other day, and i thought it was hilarious.
Bailey got into my moisturizer and well, this isn't the worst she has done with lotion:)

Memorial Day 2008

Here is Bailey before we left to go to Matt's sister's for a BBQ. She looked so cute with her little braids:) We had a pretty good time visiting and eating. the kids did good for a while, until nap time was way over due and they wanted to kill each other. Needless to say, we left shortly after that and Bailey crashed in the car immediately. I love Holidays!

So that is it. i have more pics, but i figure this blog is long enough:) Have a great day!

My New Hair Cut!

So, you know when you are pregnany, you are not suppossed to dye you hair? Well, i get antsy. My hair was driving me crazy. It was too long and my root were grown out like 10 ft. So about a week ago, I decided it was time. I cut got my hair cut short in an A line bob. Let me know if you like it:)

This is not the best picture in the world, but i was taking it of myself. You get the jist of what it looks like:)